Category Archives: Calvin Phoenix

I am shaped by my grief

The 5th Belongs to Calvin: International Bereaved Mothers Day – I choose to live and to honor you

This month, the 5th is special for several reasons: this is Calvin’s 50th month in heaven (that actually makes me want to cry, knowing how long it’s been since I’ve held him), it is International Bereaved Mothers Day, and it is the 1 year anniversary of Still Standing Magazine and…

The 5th Belongs to Calvin: It doesn’t mean you are forgotten

“I was too broken to appreciate the intimate relationships others hold with my babies. Now I realize that those relationships are sacred, that my babies don’t belong just to me. And that means something wonderful: they aren’t forgotten. “

Happy 4th birthday to my first born.

I’ll see you in heaven, my Calvin. Mommy loves you. (Posted via Instagram)

The 5th Belongs to Calvin: 47 months

Happy 5th my Calvin… I can’t believe next month will be 4 years. I miss you everyday. (Posted via Instagram)

Grandkids on His Handlebars

My dad asked Louie to paint his handlebars with the names of his grandchildren. So Louie painted *all* of their names: Divinity, Jayden, Sky, Jayme, Calvin, Rainbow, Kimora, Jayde, Gaelen, Kihana, Charlie, and Pixel. I added the quote, “Great fathers get promoted to grandfathers” on the left side.

The 5th Belongs to Calvin: My two boys

I “stole” this image from the hubby to post because seeing Charlie hold big brother Calvin’s urn makes my heart ache and swell at the same time. Happy 5th Calvin. (Posted via Instagram)

The 5th Belongs to Calvin: The latest I’ve ever been

I have been writing this post in my head for weeks. It’s been on my mind since before November 5th, yet here I am, almost at the end of the month and finally getting the words down and planning to finally click the “Publish” button. It’s not that I forgot….