Monday, October 19, 2020
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Capture Your Grief – Day 12: Music

“All of Me” is one of those songs that just overcomes me. It sums up how I feel about every one of my children — how I felt when I learned of Calvin’s amniotic band syndrome and then held him after he was stillborn, how I felt during each following pregnancy (including the pregnancy with my earth baby).

You’re gonna know all my love
Even if it’s not enough
Enough to mend our broken hearts
But giving you all of me
Is where I’ll start

Matt Hammitt. “All of Me.” Every Falling Tear. Sparrow Records, 2011.

Music is a part of my relationship with each of my children. And it is one of the few ways that I continue to connect with my heaven babies. You can listen to “All of Me” and some of the other songs that remind me of Calvin, Rainbow, Gaelen, and Pixel on this YouTube playlist (

Capture Your Grief is an annual, 31-day mindful healing project that consists of photography and reflection. It is for “anyone who is grieving the death of a baby or child at any age or gestation.” Learn how you can participate or provide support at Carly Marie Project Heal.

Crystal is a mother-wife-writer whose explorations include parenting, grief, food, and semi-crunchy living. She is currently an MFA in writing student, a content editor for Still Standing Magazine, and the technical editor for Switchback.

"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." (Ephesians 4:29)

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