Because I was so anxious and worried and nervous and scared and terrified that I might have an ectopic pregnancy that would burst while I was traveling to Florida, my nurse agreed to do a blood test to see if my hCG levels were high enough to do an ultrasound (she also checked my progesterone, because I was anxious about that, too, given my early losses). So on Monday, I went in for the bloodwork. I got the beta hCG results on voicemail at the end of the day: 7,057. Then my nurse called me back the next morning, and I got scheduled to go in.
We saw our little Bumble Bee on the ultrasound—well, his or her gestational sac and yolk sac (the little “cheerio” in the black sac in the image on the left) in the gestational sac, in my uterus. I heard Louie let out a huge sigh. The nurse practitioner said that it looked good for this early in pregnancy and with my numbers, things appear to be going well. I was given a pregnancy packet (I haven’t received one of these since being pregnant with Calvin) and told that my due date is June 5.
The thing with taking fertility meds is that it can cause more than one egg to be released, and even if one implants in the uterus, there is a rare chance of one implanting in the fallopian tube instead of making it’s way down. So, I’m not completely in the clear, but I am so relieved to know that this pregnancy seems to be going well. I just need to hold onto that, and continue to set small goals (on the advice of some amazing baby loss and rainbow mommies out there) instead of getting myself into a panic over trying to reach the end of this 9 1/2 month journey. So, my next goal is to make to our ultrasound next Friday and see Bumble Bee’s little heart fluttering away. I didn’t get to see that with Rainbow or Gaelen, so, of course, it is a huge milestone. And as always, prayers, hopes, healthy vibes, positive energy, sticky baby dust, and good baby juju are most welcome.
This post is part of the NaBloPoMo daily blogging challenge. The theme for this month is “Between,” which goes perfectly with how I’ve been feeling and where I find myself: between hope and despair, between love and fear, between trying to conceive and holding a living child in my arms. The prompt for today is: Talk about one important thing that happened between last Friday and today.
You and I do not know each other…well except what I have read here on your blog…I linked here to your blog, after you had lost Calvin, from Rachel’s blog (JaCoCo’s Mommy) and was drawn by your raw honesty and candor with which you talk about your loss and how it affects you and those around you. I suffered a miscarriage in my second pregnancy, and although I was utterly devastated at the time, I already had a child at home and went on to have two more healthy children. I had NO IDEA there were so many women out there like yourself who were struggling so hard just to have their first I’ve learned through watching yours, Rachel’s and a few of the others journeys, along with some of the women that I work with at the hospital (I am a pediatric oncology nurse) so much about infertility and incompetent cervixes, and all the other possible reasons a woman may have difficulty carrying a baby to term and I look at my children in a much different light…and I have been praying for all of you ladies whose stories I follow, that the Lord will touch your bodies and allow a healthy baby to be carried to term and that you and Louie may be granted the peace and the joy that comes with every sleepless newborn night, the sweetness of every stinky, poopy diaper and the beauty of breastfeeding every hour on the hour. My heart has been broken for you and your husband each time you lost another child and I am celebrating this new life inside of you now!! I know we don’t know each other and I hope you don’t mind that I have been ffollowing your story…you have taught me so much about how my friends and co workers might have been feeling and how I could support them best. I also wanted to let you know that someone in Perrysburg, Ohio was praying for you, Louie and your sweet baby!
Sincerely,
Melanie Whitaker
Melanie, thank you so much for your kind words and your prayers. It brings tears to my eyes. We may not know each other, but I am so honored that you are bearing witness to this journey and rooting for us. Thank you so much.
You and I do not know each other…well except what I have read here on your blog…I linked here to your blog, after you had lost Calvin, from Rachel’s blog (JaCoCo’s Mommy) and was drawn by your raw honesty and candor with which you talk about your loss and how it affects you and those around you. I suffered a miscarriage in my second pregnancy, and although I was utterly devastated at the time, I already had a child at home and went on to have two more healthy children. I had NO IDEA there were so many women out there like yourself who were struggling so hard just to have their first I’ve learned through watching yours, Rachel’s and a few of the others journeys, along with some of the women that I work with at the hospital (I am a pediatric oncology nurse) so much about infertility and incompetent cervixes, and all the other possible reasons a woman may have difficulty carrying a baby to term and I look at my children in a much different light…and I have been praying for all of you ladies whose stories I follow, that the Lord will touch your bodies and allow a healthy baby to be carried to term and that you and Louie may be granted the peace and the joy that comes with every sleepless newborn night, the sweetness of every stinky, poopy diaper and the beauty of breastfeeding every hour on the hour. My heart has been broken for you and your husband each time you lost another child and I am celebrating this new life inside of you now!! I know we don’t know each other and I hope you don’t mind that I have been ffollowing your story…you have taught me so much about how my friends and co workers might have been feeling and how I could support them best. I also wanted to let you know that someone in Perrysburg, Ohio was praying for you, Louie and your sweet baby!
Sincerely,
Melanie Whitaker
Melanie, thank you so much for your kind words and your prayers. It brings tears to my eyes. We may not know each other, but I am so honored that you are bearing witness to this journey and rooting for us. Thank you so much.
YAY!!!! YAY!!!! Tears in my eyes tonight–so happy for you. Praying so hard that this little one will join you and Louie in June! Here on Earth! Happy and healthy!! 🙂 🙂
YAY!!!! YAY!!!! Tears in my eyes tonight–so happy for you. Praying so hard that this little one will join you and Louie in June! Here on Earth! Happy and healthy!! 🙂 🙂
thank you!!
will keep hoping and celebrating the small milestones with you! I can’t imagine how wonderful it will be to hear the heartbeat of your baby – what you missed out with R and G.
thank you, sweet patty. you and your joey have been on my mind <3
Stickbabydustyjujuvibes heading your way.
xxx
Stickbabydustyjujuvibes heading your way.
xxx
xoxo thank you.
I actually haven’t told ANYONE yet, other than DP and my doctor, but I got a positive test on Sept. 28th and my tentative EDD is June 5th as well! Wishing us both a healthy, uneventful 9 months!
Congratulations! I hope we will be sharing birth stories on the same day 🙂
Glad everything is going well! Praying for you and the little one!
Glad everything is going well! Praying for you and the little one!
Thank you, sweetie. Thinking of you and your baby, too!