Saturday, August 8, 2020
Home > My Babies > Calvin Phoenix > To the Father of My Missing Child

To the Father of My Missing Child

I know I can’t
make you whole again
But I’m here.
I’m here to catch
your tears in the palms of my hand,
to try to make the landing a little less

when you fall,
because I’m falling,

too. So I’ll go down with you,
when we are
ready, we can
help one another climb
back up, when we are ready,
but only then.
And if you are never

to let go

of our child, of our baby,
know that it’s okay because I can’t
let Calvin go, either,
at least not in the way of forgetting
or letting ourselves lose
him to the aching of our grief.

I love you, Louie. Happy Father’s Day.

Crystal is a mother-wife-writer whose explorations include parenting, grief, food, and semi-crunchy living. She is currently an MFA in writing student, a content editor for Still Standing Magazine, and the technical editor for Switchback.

"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." (Ephesians 4:29)

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