I will keep you

for Calvin

I will keep you in my heart and carry you there each day. And when I am in my deepest of grieving, my son, I will remember the morning I held you in my arms and saw you in your father’s. In those brief hours, the world stopped in silence and honored us. Time stopped and let our family be whole. And the pain of losing you fell away, like gossamer carried away on a passing breeze. For a moment—a moment that is enough, yes, enough to sustain me through the many, many days of living I must endure without you—I forgot the feeling of loss. You filled my heart. You fill it still.