The 5th Belongs to Calvin: Dandiewinks Prelaunch

I’ve been interested in many-things artsy, crafty, and designy for almost as long as I can remember. From making flyers, programs, and invitations for family, my youth group, and department events in college; to freelance web and print projects; to the pendants, blocks, and paintings I create.

After I had Calvin, I was inspired to move forward and finally started a website at CalvinPhoenix.com (which is now archived at my main domain, Louie Loves Crystal). I decided that Calvin Phoenix Design would be my small business name, and started posting some of my work.

Then I got pregnant with Rainbow and lost her, too. Devastation. I never registered my business name, because it felt wrong not to include both of my babies.

Eventually I decided on Phoenix and Rainbow. I thought this name would be perfect, that I wouldn’t need to worry because I couldn’t possibly lose another child, and my living children would understand.

Then I got pregnant with Gaelen. And I lost her, too. More heartbreak. The reality that there is no threshold of losing babies and almost giving up.

But I wanted something I could hold onto, something that would not just be for my babies in heaven, but also for future children and for myself.

Then came Dandiewinks

Dandiewinks is a combination of the words dandelion + winks. The dandelion seeds represent my babies. The winks represent, well, the winks I receive from them that keep me feeling inspired and connected to them. And the name Dandiewinks is also fun and whimsical, and that’s a part of me that I believe my babies would want me to hold onto.

So here it is, on Calvin’s special day, with a little nervousness: the pre-launch of Dandiewinks.com. Please feel free to stop by and check out our first project under the new name: a header illustration for Meg, aka Helicopter Mommy. You can also keep in touch by “Liking” the Dandiewinks Facebook page. I’m so excited to move forward with this renewed adventure.

Calvin, you and your sisters make me want to be more, to move toward inspiration and creative expression. Losing each of you has been my greatest heartache, and I won’t be healed until we are together again. But you’ve also blessed me beyond what I can comprehend in this life, and I am so grateful and honored to be your mommy. Happy 2 1/2 years in heaven, my darling.